Thursday, January 18, 2007

Fear of Friday

I posted a while back that my wife was going to come exchange a few things with me, but ultimately that didn't happen. Since we still need to swap some stuff, we had planned on doing it Saturday evening instead.

It turns out that won't work so well, because my parents are coming to visit for a while. Their power has been out since last Saturday, and there's no telling when it will be back on.

So, with Saturday not good for me anymore, we decided to do it tomorrow night. For some strange reason, that fills me with a strong feeling of ... fear. So I'm sitting here with an upset stomach trying to figure out exactly what it is that I'm afraid of.

At this point, it may just be that I've started to associate seeing her with pain. The last time I saw her, I cried. That was almost 2 weeks ago, so I hope this time I'm stronger. Still, although I try to gird myself, I really don't know what my reaction will be. Wish me luck.


Dream Reader said...

You'll make it. You seem stronger than you give yourself credit for. Just do what you've got to do and be done with it. What if you made plans with a friend or your kids later in the evening of Friday? That wy you would have a limit on the amount of time you spend with her. It just seems the longer the time you spend with her the harder it will be. Just a thought??

Wounded Heart said...

The problem is not that I don't want to see her. The problem is that I do want to see her.

Dream Reader said...

I know what the problem is. That's why I suggested that you limit the time. You're only going to be hurting yourself, if she doesn't give you the reaction or attention you still want from her. Does that sense?

Wounded Heart said...

That is exactly what the problem is - how perceptive of you.